For the love of bacon

I have a pretty short attention span when it comes to advertising. Most ads, commercials and radio spots are just white noise or white space to me. Even earworm-inducing jingles usually backfire--I find myself humming or singing the tune, with no idea what product it was intended to pimp.

But yesterday, as I was thumbing through the latest issue of one of my city's alternative papers (cleverly-titled The Other Paper), an ad gave me pause. Actually, that's an understatement. You know that old Hollywood convention of a needle being scratched across a record that signifies an action coming to an abrupt halt? If anybody else had been present in my home at the moment my eyes fell on that ad, they may have heard that sound.

The ad was for a product called Bacon Salt.

I'm not even sure what about the ad affected me so strongly. Maybe it was the amount of text (a prolific 100+ in a half-page ad). Maybe the phrase "free sample" jumped out at me as my eyes skimmed the page. Most likely, though, it was the irresistible lure of fatty meat. The siren song of fried pork. The stirring of a less-evolved part of my brain, crying out to the universe that yes--oh, yes indeed--everything should taste like bacon.

Due to some technical difficulties, I cannot upload a picture of the actual ad that so captivated me, and I can't find it online either. But the sheer number of Google hits for the product tell me that I'm not the only one who sat up and took notice.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to run to the store for some Bacon Salt.